** This response is biblically sound, well written, and personable. The specific question is answered directly as well as the broader issue of how to handle claims of seeming contradictions from critics. Links to articles are well used to help round out certain topical understanding. Illustrative examples help provide further clarity. The writing has logical flow and a genuinely friendly tone. **
Question: Some Bible translations state that 1 Corinthians 13:5 reads “[Love] does not demand its own way”. If God Himself is love (1 John 4:8) and rightfully asks us to accept only His way (John 14:6), how do we explain to a critic who thinks there may be a contradiction in that God, since He is love, should not demand others to obey Him? Do we answer by reminding them that God just knows far better than us and His ways are always higher than anyone else’s? (Isaiah 55:8–9)
Answered by: Jason Morgan, who has been a volunteer with us since February, 2018.
Answer: Hello and thank you for your question!
When addressing any contradiction or topic from a critic, it is first very important to establish clear definitions. Make sure we are talking about the same topic in the same context, and nobody is building any straw man arguments. Regarding the notion you brought up where the Scriptures tell us “love does not demand its own way” and yet God clearly instructs us his way is the only way. This seems almost contradictory at first glance and certainly in line with what a critic might say about it. As I said first though, let’s pause and break down everything being said to make sure we are on the same page.
What does love mean? And what is the context of love in 1 Corinthians 13:5? Rather than get into that here I will reference a few existing articles on our site they give a good overview of this:
What we notice is the contextual emphasis here is on relationship. Ignore this and It may seem easy to say “well if God is love and HE clearly insists on his way as the only way (John 14:6) then something is amiss or we have a contradiction.”
The answer, however, is fairly simple in this observation: We just point out to the critic that clearly God is not demanding his own way, since the critic is apparently free to choose otherwise. One does not have to accept Jesus as the way, the Truth, and the Life. Now this does not change the Truth of John 14:6. While 1 Corinthians 13:5 deals with how love expresses itself in relationship, John 14:6 is stating a fact regarding a specific relationship with God. If you wish to love God and have a relationship with him, then sin must be dealt with… The only way God dealt with our sin was through Jesus Christ. It’s as simple as the idea that if I want to continue to live- I need water, but am not forced to drink it. God’s love allows us to choose, his truth informs us of the consequences of our choice.
Another good analogy here is a parent/child relationship. 1 Corinthians 13:5 stating “love does not insist on its own way” is in the context of serving and loving another person. Would we then make a case that because I love my 5 year old, when they ask to go play in the middle of the highway I must remain neutral? On the contrary! It is my love for them that demands I take action. I am expressing my love and responsibility for them through asking them to obey. It is God’s love for us that drove the action of Christ taking our sins upon himself. It is our love for him in accepting this sacrifice that drives us to obedience when he warns us not to play in the “road” of sin. It is never for God’s sake that he requires obedience. He’s just fine without us, but it is for our sake when we obey him.
To summarize, let me put it like this: God’s perfect love for us in shown in His NOT demanding his own way, allowing each of us to freely choose whether to have a relationship with him (John 14:6) so that we might become children of God and express our love for him through obedience. Not because God demands his way for his sake, but because God’s way is true, he is the source of all good things, and it is for our sake.
